Cindy Sheehan
I've been thinking a lot about
kindness recently. Back near the first of this year, I posted a piece here about
New Year's resolutions. This year my intended resolve, I said, would focus on
trying to be kinder. This is not going to be a confession of failure at that
although there is plenty of room for personal improvement. In the last month or
so I've witnessed two instances of un-kindness that really didn't need to happen
at all let alone in the personal way they did.
In one, a young woman was brought
to tears in a public place and in the other a young man (also in a public place)
already upset was goaded into deeper anger by totally unnecessary additional
confrontation. How little understanding it would have taken to keep these
hurtful actions from happening. Only a few people witnessed these two moments;
millions have seen the unkind and emotional brutalization of Cindy Sheehan.
The right wing of our political
spectrum calls her a shill for the anti-war movement and there are parts of the
left who see her activism as a rallying point for their views. She is probably
some of both. She is also a mother who has buried her son, the child who came home almost
daily with another wrinkled kindergarten masterpiece destined for the
refrigerator door, the same little one who was bursting with anticipation at
seeing the look on his mother's face when she unwrapped the first Mother's Day
present he ever made himself.
Her baby boy is dead. There will
be no more Mother's Day presents, homemade or store bought with a few crumpled dollars
dredged from the depths of a little boy's pocket. She will never hear his "Hi,
Mom!" greeting on the phone again. Her present reminder of his life will be
his name and dates of birth and death etched into a piece of cold stone. We
don't have to agree with her but we are bound as fellow humans to honor her
grief without judgment.
Have we become so polarized in our
views that we can only view a mother's grief in terms of our own political
agenda? Do we really live, as it is beginning to appear, in a zero sum
world?
In the politics of false "patriotism" that we now live with, denigrating the rightful and meaningful grief that Cindy Sheehan expresses with resolve and grace we are further taking away from our society the kindness and open debate we so desperately need in this country. When John Murtha gets on the House floor and asks the right questions about our reason for being in Iraq and how we were duped into war, this decorated Vietnam veteran is called a coward. When John Kerry ran for President, his courage and combat commendations from Vietnam are thrown into the political dirt and questioned---all encouraged behind the scenes by those who bravely "served" in the Air National Guard and got five deferments. When I countered a man at a farmer's market a couple of months ago who was berating a another man who had set up an anti-war table about Iraq, he called us both cowards and "unpatriotic." When I asked him if he had ever been in combat he said, "No." Then I told him I had, evacuating wounded under fire, and I had the right to say whatever the hell I wanted about this country's policies and the same for the other guy. He walked away in a huff. And that's the problem in this country now: To question our government is something akin to promoting sedition and treason. Cindy Sheehan has the right to question why her son died. We all have the right to question, petition, march, debate, set up stands at farmer's markets and the like regardless of whether we are for or against. And we all have the right to demand the truth, not the varnished, slick spin of a White House that is blind to the realities of those who are making the sacrifice. It's not about questioning the courage of those who are there, it's making sure that their courage is warranted and respected. God Bless, Cindy Sheehan. She's speaking for many of us.
Posted by: Alain | 30 November 2005 at 11:32 AM
I think these thoughts are fantastic. My heart aches however for the remaining sibligs and the marriage that is falling apart. At a time when a family should come together,circle the wagons and take care of each other, Mrs Sheehan has left the others to greive without the comfort of her embrace to the ones who still need her.
She has every right to protest and question the politics of this war. I think maybe this isn't the best time or maybe the best way. Maybe after some months have passed and the scab created by time has had a chance to set and dull the hurt.
I can't imagine leaving my girls if I was to loose one...
Ruth
Posted by: Ruth | 30 November 2005 at 09:16 PM