Blogs As Bartenders

Introduction 
Posted on July 23, 2004 at 02:40:05 PM
After my divorce ten years ago it had taken me a while to get to the point of being content as a single person. So much so in fact that I remember thinking that I wasn’t really convinced I needed to meet anyone and that I could live the balance of my life as a single person. I do recall rationalizing to myself that if the right person came along…nothing is etched in stone.

This is my, no doubt overly emotional account, of my thoughts during the last month or so and my ongoing thoughts as they occur. If it is self indulgent, so be it. I have to put it somewhere, tell it to someone, get it off my mind lest it crush me.

I don’t really know if anyone besides me will ever see this blog. Most likely they won’t but even if I am willing to put my feelings and fears out there, I cannot make that decision for anyone else so I’ll scrub any detail that might compromise privacy.

It should not matter if my words are published; it should be enough, it seems, to write them down. But it does matter. Maybe it’s like the guy drowning his sorrows at the bar, bonding with the bartender.

I warn you ahead of time, it is sentimental and if a critic were to read it they might well tag the word “slop” on. Read at your own risk but while you are doing that, if you begin to feel as if this is so much silliness, try to imagine the sort of feelings that are so piquant, so real that even if they are feelings of sadness or loss you are still grateful for them because they tell you that you are alive. Remembering especially the peaks that are the product of my awareness and that infuse my soul with hope such that I know that no matter what happens in the future I will still say, “It was all good!”